So many women have this problem, and Laurie WJN thinks it’s about time we learned to accept a compliment simply and graciously. Read more from Laurie on her blog, Looking on the Sunnyside.
Two little words, we use them all the time, but for some most women these words are almost impossible to say when receiving a compliment.
You’ve seen it, you have probably done it yourself, someone offers you a compliment, “Wow that dress is so pretty on you” and you respond with, “Oh this, it was on sale” or “Really, I think it makes my hips look too big, I wish I could lose that stubborn ten extra pounds” or “This old thing, I’ve had it for years”. You deflect the compliment by offering some explanation or comment that will take the attention away from you. Women have an uncanny ability to negate any compliment. This overly developed sense of humility keeps us from acknowledging our accomplishments.
Someone says, “you look great, have you lost weight?” and you reply with “I’m trying but it’s so hard, and I have so much weight to lose.” Your quick deflection.
We have no difficulty in offering a genuine compliment. We see a friend and share a heartfelt greeting that they have never looked better, but we find it incredulous to think they the same of ourselves. We tell ourselves that we cannot possibly deserve these kind words that the giver must be lying or misguided. Our internal voice screams at us, “you don’t deserve these kind words” so we look for ways to negate them.
There are two simple words that can break this vicious cycle – Thank You. That’s it. No explanations or commentary is necessary. We need to learn how to graciously say, “Thank You”. It may take some practice, but it is time women started learning how to receive compliments.