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Hop On the Midlife Roller Coaster

As time comes and goes we become hopeless in many aspects of our lives.

We see years that have passed as huge boulders lying on our shoulders.  They become restrictions that others or ourselves place within our mind frame or life.

Does it have to be this way?

NO, NO, and, another BIG NO!!!!!!!


Midlife is one of the greatest, if not the best time of our lives.  We have so much to do and to see, with just a hint of the huge worry we carried during our child rearing years.

One of the first things we need to do is let go.  We have to let our children go into the world and find their own path.  For me this sometimes proves difficult, being an overprotective mom.  Speaking from my experience, it’s harder because you need to give yourself a hard look about the “what am I going to do now?” issue.

We live in a youth-oriented culture.  People searching aggressively to get the elixir of the fountain of eternal youth do anything and everything to recapture their youth as those forties and fifties come rolling in. Is it worth it?  NO again!

Our youth is a long distance memory. That’s why we idealize it and want it back.  Our mind has probably shut down all the pain that comes with being young.  Many of us didn’t know who we were or where we were going.  We were on a path of discovery in all aspects of our lives.  Questions and uncertainly plagued us every day and we weren’t sure where are lives were heading.  To top it off, don’t forget our relationships.  We didn’t have a clue if our high school or college sweetheart would be the one.  We weren’t even sure if we would be lucky enough to find him or her.

Fast forward, in our late forties and fifties we know where  we stand – or at least we should know by now.

We already know what happened with our high school sweethearts and even what happened with the nefarious “one that got away”.  We are strong and capable of knowing who we are and where we want to go.  Don’t let others put you down.   Life is incredible at this age if you don’t let others tell you how to live and move forward to a time that should be much better than any other time of your life.

Nowadays my fountain of eternal youth is looking at my mom.  She’s vibrant and gorgeous looking and when I look at  her at her magnificent seventy-four years, I kick myself and think:

“Wow, if Mom is looking that great I have so much to look forward too.”

For all the cry-babies out there – if this is not true and you have a terrible looking mom, do your best to make sure you become a great looking mom to encourage your own children as they come along midlife.

Let’s embrace opportunity and life and recapture not our youth, but what we are today.  Why think about how things were or how we were? Let’s rejoice in what we are today.

This is time for new careers (hopefully the ones we dreamed about but, couldn’t pursue), new ways of thinking about money, sex, spirituality and everything that surrounds us.  Call me crazy, but I’m enrolling in graduate school next fall and I’m thrilled about it.

Take a long look at your significant other (new or old) and get to know him or her all over again.  Let passion grow to another dimension, let go of your preconceptions and enjoy everything your love has to offer.  You’ll be  surprised where this will take you!!  I assure you that the thrill is much more than a roller coaster ride.

Use the same equation for the rest of the things you want to reconsider. Make some changes that will put butterflies in your stomach (as in excitement and thrill) as you face new experiences.

This time in our lives is about being true to ourselves, getting everything out of the box and learning to change. Accepting where we are is just the first step.

So my dear friends hop on midlife like it was one of the best rides of your life and enjoy it, because that it was life is all about.

Read more from Maritza Martinez on her blog, Believing


Maritza Martinez

I'm a stay at home English teacher, mother of four (one daughter and three boys) and have been happily married to my high school sweetheart for over twenty-seven years. I love to read, write and garden. I strive to always be learning new things, and to reflect on life with its ups and downs. Books have always been my best friends and helped me overcome a very difficult childhood. I owe this to a great teacher who taught me to love books and vegetables and inspired me to become a teacher. I struggle with a chronic illness (Myasthenia Gravis) everyday, but I don't let it take control of who I am. I take life at a slower pace and am enjoying every minute of it.

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