If you know me in real life, you know that lately I’ve taken to putting a bandana thingy on my head instead of blow-drying my hair. And while I’m pretty sure that I’ve seen some of you think, “why doesn’t she just get a freaking hair cut?”, the truth is that the bandana serves an even bigger purpose than my lazy-ass morning routine.
Call me vain but guess what I’ve been seeing when I look in the mirror?
Never mind I’ll just tell you.
Gray hair, that’s what!
While everyone else can pass a mirror and see an ordinary, full reflection of themselves, whenever I look in the mirror all I get is a telescopic view of MY SCALP.
What does that mean? It means it’s time – once again – to take a trip to the hair salon so that I can fool myself into believing that dying my hair will keep me looking young forever.
Do I “really” believe that I can look young forever?
The answer to that question depends on whether or not I’m drinking wine at the time. Not that wine affects my eyesight – it just sort of “massages” my perception. Which kind of makes wine the all-purpose duct tape / WD-40 of aging.
Dear people who have been searching for the fountain of youth: I just found it.
It’s wine.
You’re welcome.
PS. I have no image to go with this post because I’m not drinking wine right now. (Don’t judge me. It’s 6 a.m.)
PPS. Oh and if you’ve ever wondered who invented the “mimosa”, I’m pretty sure it was a woman who woke up one Monday morning – when hair salon’s are closed – and realized that she needed something to hide her inch-thick Pepé Le Pew streak.
PPPS. So technically, SHE invented the fountain of youth.
Read more from Mona Andrei on her blog, Moxie-Dude
Mona Andrei
Mona Andrei is a technical writer for a serious company in a serious industry. When she’s had enough serious for one day, she likes to write irreverent posts for her personal blog, Moxie-Dude, life updates gone wrong. Or right. She’s undecided. Follow her on Twitter @MoxieDude
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