It’s an feeling all of us with grown children have – how did this happen? Where did this adult come from? Miriam Iwrey spent a lovely Mother’s Day with her grown son. Read more from Miriam on her website, New Achievements Elite Coaching.
I had the privilege of spending Mother’s Day with my son Ben.
As a 30 year old he has started to grow into his own skin; he is more open about where he is, what he wants, what he doesn’t want. He is building his life and it is a wonder to watch it happen; he is adventurous, willing to take big risks, big dreamer who follows through–traits I admire and respect.
The conversations we had were filled with philosophy, humor, pure acceptance of each other…my little guy has been growing up and the results are fabulous.
Driving home I reflected on that empty feeling I felt 12 years ago when I dropped him off to college, drove home and realized he was not coming back to live with me. Over the years, we both grew wings and have used them; flown into new adventures all the while having a relationship that is based on love and healthy understanding of each other.
Empty nest is jarring but over time watching our children grow into their own takes the sting out!
It is also clear that we do see ourselves in our children both the traits we like about ourselves and the traits we are not necessarily in love with. Boy did I see that on Sunday.
I love the fact my son is so adventurous (trips hiking in Alaska every year); he, like me, loves to travel, meet new people and make memories.
I admire his ability to set goals and reach them. As a single mom I know I modeled for him that setting goals is imperative for a successful life.
What I saw also was his stubbornness. He did get that trait from me. In fact we talked about it and he asked me how I manage it. My response was I am always aware, I do self talk and the biggest question I ask myself is “why am I being so stubborn? What is it I am trying to prove and do I have to prove anything?” The wisdom of being in my 50’s is I have the ability to step back and decide when is it important to be stubborn and if it doesn’t fit, I can let it go.
I so look forward to the years coming up watching my son come into his own.