Skip to Content

5 Ways to Dress with Flair

“Flair is winking at the mirror…having fun as you redefine and maybe even reinvent yourself so that your look is a perfect reflection of your creative energies and imagination.” – Ellen Shubin

5 Ways to

This post contains affiliate links. 

What do you think of when you hear the word FLAIR?  When I first read Ellen Shubin’s book, The Essentials of Fabulous, I thought of a very confident, joyful, woman who enters a room with her head held high.  She has panache, that je ne sais quoi, visibility…..flair.

Shubin explains women who dress with flair have a “remarkable combination of style and self.”  I believe few aspire to have flair, but it is something which develops with confidence and a positive, joyful lifestyle.  “Unlike the fashion slaves who live in fear of making a mistake, the stylish are only concerned with two things: finding the elegant solution to looking good, no matter their age or size, and maximizing their fun in everyday life,” write Shubin.

This is where she says to begin.  I do recommend this entire book; I am simply hitting a few highlights:

  1. A woman with flair wears clothes with oomph not ouch.

BANISH: itchy, ill-fitting, uncomfortable, too small, and too tight, too narrow, too wide, too unflattering, and too depressing.

KEEP:  What makes you feel gorgeous….what you want to touch and stroke because of its beauty…what makes you feel leaner, longer, original, intriguing…clothes that keep your spirit airborne (Love that!) 

  1. A woman with flair does not worship idols.

When they buy something, it’s because it fits perfectly (or can be altered), it makes them feel

Terrific, and hopefully it will help maintain the memorable and intriguing image they are always working on.  Clothes that you love and love you back will never go out of style and fashion!

  1. A woman with flair wears the same clothes over and over again.

Those with flair and an original point of view are free from what other people think!

  1. A woman with flair swears by the basics, but the basics are perfect!

The truly stylish create a wardrobe composed of a small number of superb pieces that can be worn in a myriad of ways.

  1. A woman with flair is obsessed with accessories.

Shubin writes, “Flair is your imprint, your personal mark of originality.”  These women know how to juxtapose solemnity of classic attire with the frivolity of imaginative accessories.  Flair is giving good tastes a boot!  She reminds us finding accessories to help create an intriguing look requires opening our eyes to the world around us.   She even encourages as we get older to get wackier with what we try…bolder accessories, saturated colors, and vintage pieces are ways to do this with flair.

Shubin tells us that flair is not just the way we present ourselves, but an attitude about the way we live life.  She reminds that clothes tell a story of how we see ourselves.

So, I ask you, what story are you telling?  Do you have a negative reaction to the word FLAIR…or is it something you desire?

Personally, I believe women who dress with flair in midlife or any age always wear the same accessory – a fabulous smile.  Joy is emanating from their confidence and positive outlooks.

Thanks for stopping by the Joy Boutique. Have a wonderful first week of autumn, everyone!

midlife boulevard, columnist, midlife women, middle-age, midlife crisis

Pamela Lutrell

Pamela Lutrell began her blog, over50feeling40, July 2010 with a desire to encourage women over 50 to walk in strength, confidence and joy. Of course, head turning style makes each day fun!

More Posts - Website

Follow Me:
TwitterFacebookLinkedInPinterestGoogle Plus


Friday 26th of September 2014

Perfect points!! I loved Ellen's book. She's a stunning woman who really knows what it takes to be FABULOUS!! She told me she's working on a sequel...which I can't wait to get my hands on. I've read this one twice! Happy weekend Pam! xo~Jennifer

Joan Stommen

Wednesday 24th of September 2014

Love this, Pam! I do wear the same clothes over and over and my favorite things all the time.....never considered it was flair. Just makes me feel and look good! But it's true......when you feel good, it shows...and you carry that vibe all day long! Thanks for making my day!


Tuesday 23rd of September 2014

Oh yes Pamela, I live by this, however a reminder is always in great order!!

xoxo Karena The Arts by Karena


Tuesday 23rd of September 2014

All great points and true too. Blessings, Catherine


Tuesday 23rd of September 2014

What a great post Pam! I am going to have to read this standing in front of my closet and then while trying on what I have. I want to be elegant and polished every single day, and never really considered "flair" from this perspective. I will be referring to this as I transition into my fall/winter wardrobe. I agree with what Carol said, your outfit is gorgeous!

Comments are closed.
Read previous post:
Low Testosterone, Low Libido and Fuzzy Brain

Menopause can be such a challenge. There’s the whole “fuzzy brain” scenario—you know, that “where is my car/my purse/my mind”...